Transcript — scroll to read here (or download above)

****

Grit ‘n’ Grace: Good Girls Breaking Bad Rules

Episode #51: The Best of Grit ‘n’ Grace — Our Favorite Moments from Our First Year

 

Hey, this is Cheri Gregory, and you’re listening to Grit ‘n’ Grace: Good Girls Breaking Bad Rules.

Last week, Amy ‘n’ I announced that we’d be throwing a 1st birthday party this week … but then life decided to happen. We were gonna kill ourselves to make it happen anyway … and then we remembered, “Oh yeah! We’re the grit ‘n’ grace girls! We break bad rules like that!”

So, instead of the party — which WILL happen next week — we’ve put together a Best of Grit ‘n’ Grace episode, featuring favorite moments from every single guest interview.

So without further ado, we hope you enjoy this walk down memory lane!

Episode #1: Kathi Lipp
When it comes to perfectionism in our marriage it’s so easy to see everything that your husband isn’t doing….It’s so easy—we can sit on the front porch of each other’s marriages and compare them but we don’t get invited to the back room. Systematically seeking out the good that your husband is doing and calling it out in him every single day is one of the best things that a perfectionist can do to combat, “Well, but he doesn’t, but he doesn’t, he should be,” all of those kind of things. Because when you start to recognize all the good that your husband is doing it’s amazing how it can combat all of that.

 

Episode #3: Jennifer Dukes Lee
I began to look at scripture, then, through the lens of being pre-approved. Every day, even now … because this is an idol I have to lay down every day … I ask the Lord to remind me who I already am, to take away the pressure of having to try to be someone that I wish that I could be.

 

Episode #5: Suzie Eller
Peter walked away from the fish….He left those nets hanging from the boat, filled with fish….Because in the deep — and this is where it’s key — Jesus didn’t say, “Push out into the shallow, or you just hang out here and I’m going to command the fish to go into nets.” He said, “I want you to push out into the deep.” When Peter pushed out into the deep, Jesus met him there and he was awestruck because he rediscovered who Jesus is. He followed him from that day forward. It was never ever ever ever about the fish. It’s never ever ever ever ever about the finish line. It’s about the race.

 

Episode #8: Kathi Lipp
One of the things I think is so important is you need to have a band of safe people. People that you can try stuff on, and they’re not going to say, “Wow, that sucks. What were you thinking?” But they can say, “I love your heart behind that, Kathi, but I don’t think that you’re the person who’s supposed to be speaking on that.” When people can criticize, and critique, and explore with you with love first….

 

Episode #10: Michele Cushatt
Those of us that are perfectionist like to believe that we only hold these high standards on ourselves. Right? That we like to believe we only hold ourselves to this standard of excellence, but we would never expect that of somebody else. We’re nothing but grace with everybody else. Which is a bunch of baloney. We’ll say that, because the truth is if we don’t understand grace for ourselves, we will never be able to offer it to anybody else. Period. Not really. Part of that process of letting my husband have a moment of poor behavior or poor responses in a conflict is, the only way that I can respond to that with grace, is for me to receive the grace of God first for myself.

 

Episode #12: Jennifer Dukes Lee
For me, happiness is the outward expression of an inward that is found in Jesus. We naturally have a happiness. I think God expects us to be happy. Grumpy Christians are horrible advertisements for Jesus. … I have a hard time thinking that people would find the Gospel very attractive. I think one of the first things that people can do is look into the scriptures and find evidence of a happy God, of a God with a sense of humor even just by looking at what He’s created, some of the crazy animals and fish and birds that He has created, and the facts that children learn how to smile before they even learn how to say a word.

 

Episode #14: Sheila Wray Gregoire
I think a lot of women have never given ourselves words for what we feel. I think that we honestly don’t know how to recognize some feelings. It’s a learning curve, right? Sometimes we don’t even know how we’re feeling, but really ask God to show you, because there’s so many emotions in the Bible. Emotions are good things. If we can start to identify what we’re feeling, it’s much easier to identify what you need. You’ll never figure out what you need until you know what you’re feeling.

 

Episode #16: Lucille Zimmerman
You’re right, we lose it. I think it’s critical for our creativity and our being able to come up with good ideas. The brain is so interesting because a totally different part of the brain comes online when we’re playing as when we’re working. We need that downtime. I’m sure you guys have all had this experience of having your best ideas when you’re gardening or taking a shower or jogging. It’s because our brains actually open up and become broader. They think better when we’re playing.

 

Episode #27: Suzie Eller
Living a life of gratitude is intentional. It’s absolutely intentional. It’s asking the Lord to open your eyes and see the miracles all around you. It is asking the Lord, sometimes going into his presence and saying … and we have such a sacred space to be honest with him … “I feel stuck but Lord I’m thankful that if I’m feeling stuck, I’m still hearing your voice and you’re still with me. And I’m open to whatever it is that you’re teaching me. And Lord where I am today, will you help me just bring joy to you today? I choose it. I choose it. I’m intentional.” It changes you. It may not change your circumstances, but it changes you.

 

Episode #28: Michele Cushatt
We don’t like pain. We don’t like pain. Our natural inclination is to shrink back from anything that’s painful. How do I press in to it? It begins here. And I might get emotional here: I can’t stop thinking about the cross. The place of God’s greatest pain was the place of God’s connection to us. The very place that caused him to bleed out and die was the only place where we could finally approach him. If he had shirked back from pain and suffering to preserve himself we’d all be completely lost. If I’m serious about this call to be a Jesus follower, I have to be willing to lean in to the pain and not run away from it. I have to. That’s where it starts for me. It has to start there. The irony that it was at the place of suffering that relationship finally happened.

 

Episode #30: Kathi Lipp
Yeah, figure out where your strength are and find people to complement. Then go complement them. Go be their biggest cheerleader and go partner with them because God’s got a great plan. When we try to mess with the plan, that’s when we feel overwhelmed.

 

Episode #31: Glynnis Whitwer
…but a growth mindset – what a freedom! Because you realize that you are changing. You’re growing. You’re learning new things. You’re improving – what we have is in seed form. And so everything that we have is given to us in seed form. Every natural gift, every spiritual gift – is given to us in seed form. We have the ability to grow it and develop it and change it and improve it.

 

Episode #33: Wendy Pope
Sometimes we forget that waiting is not wasting time. It’s training time. He’s preparing us for what he has prepared for us to do. We’re not ready for it so we’ve got to look at that time as an investment into our relationship with him, to knowing his voice, knowing his word, being completely confident in obeying whatever he asks us to do and that way when the time comes and he says, “Yep that is your seat, Saul’s out you’re in,” you’re ready to take the seat.

 

Episode #35: Shaunti Feldhahn
This is the way that I think of it. I think of niceness as being – it’s not like it’s bad – but it’s very surface-y. You know? It’s a surface politeness, pleasantness – there’s nothing wrong with that, it makes the world much more fun, but it also…because it’s surface-y, it’s also not this deep sense of caring about the other person. And that’s really what we’re called to do. Right? We’re called not just to be nice. We are truly called to be kind.

 

Episode #37: Emily Freeman
During a really overwhelming and stressful time in my life had a friend, counselor, mentor friend tell me … I was hoping he’s going to get me some really helpful advice on how to organize myself and how to really get a handle on my overwhelm. But this friend invited me to celebrate my smallness in the midst of my overwhelming life. So that phrase “celebrate your smallness” has really become for me a mantra. Because in those times when I feel that I have to compete, when I feel that I have to grow bigger, that phrase has brought me back down to myself, it’s brought me back down to Christ and helped me recognize that really is where relief is found. It seems like relief will be found climbing higher, and gaining more and being more successful that relief is really found in settling in and being who I am in the presence of Christ and allowing myself to be loved without anything to prove.

 

Episode #38: Emily Freeman
It’s worth doing the work to learn who you are, because the world is waiting for you….we know someone is missing. Where is she? Let’s bring her out, let’s do the work to bring her out of ourselves and of one another. What – wouldn’t friendship be beautiful if we understood what it looked like to draw one another out so that we could be gifts to one another and the world around us. I think we’re scared to do that, but oh, that’s my hopeful vision for us as a generation – is to be brave enough to come out and then to welcome one another with open arms and say, “There you are I’m so glad you’re here.”

 

Episode #40: Cindy Bultema
The four simple words that I would want to leave, that feels like the message that God has really placed on my heart for this season is that God. Is. For. You. You think about our god: our amazing, creative, personal, holy, awesome, god. God is right at this moment- not if you could get your act together, not if you cleaned your house more, not when your clothes are organized; not might be, would be, could be, should be- but God is, right at this moment, He’s FOR (and that’s where that cheering hockey mom encouraging like God is for- He is cheering for you. I like to think the God is wearing a button with our picture on it. Nobody ever wore a button. But God is cheering for you. He’s calling your name. Do we hear Him singing over us? God. Is. For. You. YOU in the yoga pants, you with the baseball hat, you with the messy hair, lipstick no lipstick…God is for you. YOU. Not someday, not for everybody else. So let’s stop comparing. Let’s stop trying to earn it or strive for it, and instead just soak in it. God is for you. And I really believe if we would receive that and believe that in the marrow of our bones and then go share that message, we could rock our world.

 

Episode #42: Kathi Lipp
I think we need to re-evaluate our yes’s on a regular basis. There are just some things that we outgrow, or our life can’t say yes to them anymore. So if you are feeling overwhelmed, what is I that you are saying yes to because you want people to like you? You want to be in a position of authority or power? You want people to respect you? And so if we’re working and we’re obliged out of any sense other than that God is calling us to that position, then it needs to be re-evaluated. And so this could be commitments you’ve made outside of your job – extra stuff you’ve decided to do … maybe your kids’ school … maybe church commitments. And I’m not asking a bunch of women to go and quit a bunch of stuff that they’re supposed to be doing. But do we not have faith that God who has called each of us into his service has enough people for what He wants to accomplish if we show up for what we are supposed to do? Episode #43: Jill Savage We have one daughter out of our five children who’s an HSP and she has a daughter that is a 4 year old and it so obvious already. So it has been life changing for us. I wish I would’ve understood it when I was raising my daughter. I didn’t. But now she’s 25, a mother herself, and I tell you I better interact with her differently because I better understand her now. I am not – I’m not highly emotional, so I used to see her being highly emotional as a fault. She’s very artistic and so and she feels the world around her, she makes decisions based on those feelings and I used to think that was a shortcoming but now I’ve realized no, this is the way she’s wired. In the past I would be – instead of a dream maker I was a dream taker. So now I just roll along with her.

 

Episode #45: Mary Snyder
And I think sometimes we’re waiting for the right person or we’ve identified the right person…and we miss the one the Lord is putting directly in front of you so…my prayer as I was building a girlfriend network…and also that waxes and wanes as we move through life. But my prayer is “Lord let me see the one who I’ve got standing in front of me, not the one I want to be friends with.”

 

Episode #47: Denise Hughes
Perfection hinders connection. And connection is what we’re really desiring. But our perfection hinders connection. I also think perfection, chasing perfection is a way of running from shame. Shame over I’m not enough, I’m not pretty enough, I’m not skinny enough, whatever I’m not enough of, I’m trying to overcompensate by finding that one thing I’m good at. And I’m going to be really good at it and I’m going to try to achieve perfection in that. So being in the Word, it always brings me back to who’s really perfect here? God. Not me. scripture is about revealing the character of God to us. So the more we’re immersed in scripture the more we’re seeing who God is and the more we have a clear view of who God is the more we have a clear picture of who we are. And then I can own my perfectionism as an attempt to have something be all about me. And I can just lay that at the feet of God and ask for his forgiveness. And ask him to give me a desire for what he desires for me.

 

Episode #49: Holley Gerth
So I am a woman who tends to say, “It all depends on me. ” Knowing that Jesus is the cornerstone and the pressure is off, I’ve been saying to myself in the past couple of days when I feel a little panicky or overwhelmed I just say, “Jesus you’re the cornerstone. Jesus you’re the cornerstone. It all depends on you.” I just didn’t know that so maybe someone else hadn’t learned that either. It’s really freeing to know that the world is not on my shoulders. It’s okay. And that means I’m allowed to be imperfect because not everything will come crashing down if I take a nap or say “No, I can’t do that right now.” So that has been a freeing truth for my heart.

 

There you have it! Grit ‘n’ Grace’s first year in review.

 

Be sure to join us next week, when we’ll be celebrating our very first birthday with a party and an amazing give-away!

 

For today, grow your grit. Embrace God’s grace. And when you run across a bad rule, you know what to do: go right on ahead and…

 

Amy & Cheri:
break it!